The Request That Goes Nowhere
You just sent a detailed proposal, presentation, or plan.
You're proud of the work. You need feedback. So you write:
"Let me know your thoughts!"
And then... crickets.
Maybe you get:
- "Looks good!" (zero useful feedback)
- Complete silence (they don't know what you want)
- "I'll take a look later" (they never do)
The problem isn't that they don't care. It's that you didn't ask a real question.
Why "Let Me Know Your Thoughts" Fails
It's Too Vague to Be Actionable
"Thoughts" could mean:
- Do you approve this?
- Do you see any risks?
- Is the strategy sound?
- Are there typos?
- Do you like the design?
- Should I send this to the client?
When you don't specify what feedback you need, people don't know how to help you.
They're stuck thinking:
- "What kind of thoughts do they want?"
- "How detailed should I be?"
- "Do they want me to nitpick or give high-level input?"
- "Is this final or a draft?"
So they do nothing. Because doing the wrong thing feels worse than doing nothing.
It Requires Too Much Mental Energy
To give you "thoughts," they have to:
- Read/review your entire document
- Figure out what kind of feedback you want
- Decide what's worth mentioning
- Organize their feedback
- Write a thoughtful response
That's 30-60 minutes of work for something you treated as casual.
They see "let me know your thoughts" and think: "This is going to take forever. I'll do it later."
Later never comes.
It Signals Low Priority
"Let me know your thoughts" sounds like:
- "This isn't urgent"
- "I don't really need this"
- "Whenever you have time (so never is fine)"
- "This is optional"
If YOU aren't specific about what you need, they'll assume it's not important.
The Psychology of Effective Feedback Requests
People Want to Help—They Just Need Direction
Nobody wants to:
- Give bad feedback
- Miss what you're actually asking for
- Waste time on feedback you don't need
Everyone wants to:
- Be helpful
- Give input that matters
- Feel like their feedback was valuable
The clearer you are about what you need, the more likely they are to give it.
Specific Questions Trigger Specific Answers
Brain science:
Vague question = overwhelm = paralysis Specific question = clear path = action
"Let me know your thoughts" → Brain: "Where do I even start?" → Result: Nothing
"Does the budget in slide 7 seem realistic?" → Brain: "I can answer that" → Result: Response
What to Ask Instead
Be Specific About What You Need
❌ Vague: "Let me know your thoughts on this proposal"
✅ Specific: "Does the timeline in section 3 seem realistic given your team's capacity?"
Why this works:
- They know exactly what to focus on
- They can answer without reading the whole thing
- Low mental burden = fast response
Ask Binary or Multiple Choice Questions
❌ Open-ended: "What do you think about the design direction?"
✅ Binary: "Should we go with Design A (modern minimal) or Design B (bold colorful)?"
✅ Multiple choice: "Which section needs the most work: intro, data analysis, or recommendations?"
Why this works:
- Easy to answer quickly
- Forces decision, not essay
- Clear path to response
Give Them Permission to Skim
❌ "Review this 20-page document"
✅ "Main question: Does the pricing make sense? (pages 5-7)
Other sections are FYI only unless something jumps out"
Why this works:
- Reduces overwhelm
- Respects their time
- Makes it manageable
Provide Context for the Feedback
❌ "Thoughts on this email?"
✅ "I'm sending this to a new client. Does it sound professional without being too formal?"
Why this works:
- They know what lens to use
- They understand what success looks like
- They can give targeted feedback
The 3 Types of Feedback Requests
1. Approval/Decision (Need a yes/no)
Bad: "Thoughts on sending this to the client?"
Good: "Is this ready to send to the client, or do you want changes first?"
Even better: "Planning to send this to the client Friday unless you flag concerns. Anything you'd change?"
2. Input/Ideas (Need their expertise)
Bad: "What do you think about this approach?"
Good: "I'm torn between two approaches: • Option A: [description] • Option B: [description]
You've done this before—which would you recommend?"
Why this works:
- Shows you value their expertise
- Gives them context for their input
- Makes them feel helpful, not burdened
3. Quality Check (Need review for errors)
Bad: "Can you review this?"
Good: "Can you check if I got the technical details right in paragraphs 3-4? Everything else is finalized."
Why this works:
- Narrow scope
- Clear success criteria
- Quick task
Real Examples: Before and After
❌ VAGUE FEEDBACK REQUEST
Subject: Proposal for review
Hi Sarah,
Attached is the Q4 proposal. Let me know your thoughts when you get a chance!
Thanks!
What's wrong:
- No indication of what needs feedback
- No timeline
- "When you get a chance" = low priority
- They have to figure out what you need
- No guidance on depth of review
Response rate: 30%
✅ SPECIFIC FEEDBACK REQUEST
Subject: Q4 proposal - need your input on budget by Wed
Hi Sarah,
I'm finalizing the Q4 proposal and need your input on one specific section before I submit it Thursday.
Specific question: Does the $45K budget breakdown in section 4 (pages 8-9) look accurate based on last quarter's numbers?
Context: Finance asked me to justify the increase from Q3, and I want to make sure I'm comparing apples to apples.
Timeline: Need your input by Wednesday EOD. If that doesn't work, let me know and I can proceed with my best estimate.
Rest of the doc is FYI only—feel free to skim or skip.
Thanks!
What's right:
- Clear what they need to review (2 pages, not whole doc)
- Specific question they can answer
- Context for why their input matters
- Real deadline
- Permission to not read everything
- Backup plan if they're too busy
Response rate: 90%
How to Structure Your Feedback Request
The Formula
- What I need: [Specific question]
- Why I need it: [Context]
- When I need it: [Timeline]
- What you can skip: [Optional sections]
Example Application
What I need: Can you check if the API integration steps in section 5 match your implementation guide?
Why I need it: I'm writing onboarding docs for new engineers and want to make sure I didn't miss any steps.
When I need it: Hoping to publish these Friday, so by Thursday afternoon would be great. If you're swamped, let me know and I can push to next week.
What you can skip: Sections 1-4 are already approved, and section 6 is just FAQs—those aren't critical.
Advanced: Feedback for Different Situations
When You Need Quick Validation
Use this: "Sanity check: Does [X] sound right?"
Example: "Sanity check: Is it normal for API calls to take 200ms, or should I optimize further?"
Why it works: Implies you mostly know the answer, just need confirmation.
When You Need Critical Feedback
Use this: "What am I missing? Where are the holes in this?"
Example: "I've been staring at this proposal for two days. What am I missing? Where would you poke holes if you were the client?"
Why it works: Explicitly asks for critical thinking, not surface-level approval.
When You're Testing an Idea
Use this: "Initial reaction: Is this worth pursuing?"
Example: "Initial reaction to this concept: Is this worth building, or am I solving a problem that doesn't exist?"
Why it works: Low commitment, early-stage, allows for honest "no."
When You Want Detailed Review
Use this: "I need a thorough review and I know it'll take time—does [timeline] work?"
Example: "This needs a thorough security review before we deploy. I know it's a 30-40 minute task. Can you block time Friday afternoon, or should I plan for next week?"
Why it works:
- Respects their time explicitly
- Acknowledges the effort required
- Offers timeline flexibility
The Feedback-Killer Phrases
❌ "Whenever you have time"
Translation: "This isn't important" Result: Never happens
❌ "Let me know if you have any questions"
Problem: Puts burden on them to figure out what to ask Better: "Let me know if section 3 needs clarification"
❌ "Any feedback welcome"
Problem: Too open-ended, paralyzing Better: "Specifically looking for feedback on [X]"
❌ "Just a quick look"
Problem: "Quick" for you might be 45 minutes for them Better: "Should take about 10 minutes to review section 2"
How to Get Faster Responses
1. Put the Question in the Subject Line
Subject: "Quick question: Should I use Option A or B for Johnson proposal?"
Not: "Johnson proposal question"
2. Use Bullets for Multiple Questions
Makes it easy to respond point-by-point:
Can you help with these 3 quick items?
- Is $10K realistic for Phase 1? (Y/N works)
- Should we include mobile or save for Phase 2?
- Do you have time to review by Friday, or should I extend to Monday?
3. Offer to Schedule a Call If Needed
If this is easier to discuss live, I can grab 15 minutes on your calendar. Otherwise, async feedback works fine.
Why this works: Gives them an out if writing feedback feels like too much work.
The 4 Tests for Feedback Requests
Before hitting send:
1. SIGNAL: Would I know exactly how to respond to this?
If you received your own email, could you answer it in 5 minutes?
2. OPPORTUNITY: Am I respecting their time?
Have you made this as easy as possible to respond to?
3. RISK: Am I being too vague?
Could they interpret this 3 different ways?
4. AFFECT: How will they feel receiving this?
Overwhelmed? Unclear? Or "Oh, I can answer that quickly"?
Check Your Feedback Request
Not sure if you're asking for feedback effectively?
Analyze it free with 4Angles →
Paste your request. See how it scores on:
- SIGNAL (Is it clear what you need?)
- OPPORTUNITY (Is this easy to respond to?)
- RISK (Are you being too vague?)
- AFFECT (How will they feel?)
Get specific fixes before you send.
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Related Reading
- Why Your "Quick Question" Isn't Quick
- How to Write a Follow-Up Email Without Sounding Desperate
- How to Tell If Your Email Will Get Ignored
About 4Angles: We analyze your writing from 4 psychological perspectives (Signal, Opportunity, Risk, Affect) to help you communicate with confidence. Free analysis available at 4angles.com.
Last Updated: 2025-10-28