They said they loved me.
But:
Love without respect:
Isn't love.
And these signs:
Showed me:
They didn't respect me:
At all.
The Signs
1. They Constantly Interrupted Me
Mid-sentence:
Every time.
My words:
Didn't matter enough:
To finish.
2. They Were Late. Always.
To everything:
- Dates
- Plans
- Meetings
- Calls
My time:
Wasn't valuable.
3. They Made Decisions Without Me
That affected both of us:
"I made plans for us Saturday."
Without asking:
If I was free.
My schedule:
Didn't matter.
4. They Talked Over Me
In groups:
I'd start speaking:
They'd:
Speak louder.
Until:
I stopped.
5. They Dismissed My Feelings
"You're being too sensitive."
"You're overreacting."
"It's not that big of a deal."
Every time:
I expressed:
How I felt.
6. They Broke Promises
Constantly:
"I'll call you later."
Never did.
"I'll be there at 7."
Shows up at 9.
"I'll work on that."
Never does.
My trust:
Wasn't worth:
Keeping their word.
7. They Criticized Me Publicly
In front of:
Friends.
Family.
Strangers.
"She's so sensitive about that."
"He's terrible with directions."
Making me:
The punchline.
8. They Didn't Keep My Secrets
Told everyone:
What I shared:
In confidence.
My privacy:
Meant nothing.
9. They Made Jokes at My Expense
Then said:
"I'm just kidding! You're so sensitive."
When I didn't laugh.
10. They Compared Me to Others
"My ex used to..."
"Why can't you be more like..."
"Other people don't have a problem with..."
I was never:
Enough:
As I was.
11. They Didn't Defend Me
When someone:
Disrespected me:
They:
- Stayed silent
- Changed the subject
- Agreed with them
Never:
Stood up for me.
12. They Checked Out During Conversations
On their phone:
While I was:
Talking about:
Something important.
What I said:
Wasn't worth:
Their attention.
13. They Canceled Plans Last-Minute
Repeatedly:
For:
- Work
- Friends
- "Something that came up"
- "Too tired"
But never:
Canceled on:
Anyone else.
Just me.
14. They Didn't Ask About My Day
Ever.
Our conversations:
Were always:
About them.
My life:
Didn't interest them.
15. They Made Me Feel Small
Around them:
I felt:
- Less than
- Not enough
- Stupid
- Insignificant
Not because:
I was.
But because:
They made me feel:
That way.
What I Told Myself
"They're just stressed."
"They don't mean it."
"I'm being too sensitive."
"Everyone has flaws."
Excusing:
Disrespect.
When I Finally Saw It
Friend: "How does he make you feel?"
Me: "Small."
Her: "That's not love."
Me: "But he says he loves me."
Her: "Words mean nothing without respect. Does he respect you?"
Silence.
Because:
No.
He didn't.
The Difference
Someone Who Respects You:
- Listens when you speak
- Values your time
- Keeps their word
- Considers your feelings
- Defends you
- Makes you feel valued
- Keeps your confidences
- Treats you well in public and private
Someone Who Doesn't:
- Interrupts constantly
- Is always late
- Breaks promises
- Dismisses your feelings
- Stays silent when you're disrespected
- Makes you feel small
- Shares your secrets
- Treats you poorly
What Changed When I Left
I met someone:
Who:
- Listened without interrupting
- Was on time
- Kept their word
- Valued my feelings
- Defended me
- Made me feel important
- Respected my privacy
- Built me up
And I realized:
How little respect:
I'd been accepting.
If You're Wondering If They Respect You
Ask:
Do they listen:
When you speak?
Do they value:
Your time?
Do they keep:
Their word?
Do they defend you:
When others don't?
Do they make you feel:
Valued?
If the answer:
Is no:
They don't respect you.
And love:
Without respect:
Isn't love.
It's control.
Or convenience.
Or comfort.
But not:
Love.
About 4Angles: Love without respect isn't real. If they interrupt, dismiss, belittle, or constantly break promises—they don't respect you. And you deserve both.
Last updated: November 2, 2025